So...Monica and David?
10:43 PM 3 Comments »
Pretty much EVERYONE in the Down syndrome community knows what I'm talking about but for those of you who don't, HBO did a documentary titled "Monica and David" and it premiered tonight. I've had my DVR set for a good two weeks and I couldn't wait to see this short film. I was so excited. The previews had me giddy at the thought of Gabby walking down the aisle one day and living a "typical" life despite the extra 21.
.
So I sat down tonight with my Littles' in my arms and we watched...
.
Within the first thirty seconds I was feeling sad. You know how documentaries start of with the black screen with white words talking about "Down syndrome affects 1 in 800, blah blah blah." Well then it goes on to say "The average life expectancy of a person with Down syndrome is 50 years." Ouch. It stung...BAD. And to think- this is SO MUCH BETTER than what it used to be- a mere 35 years. So yeah, I guess I should be grateful but that right there set me off on the wrong foot. I don't know what I expected really. It's not like they were lying or that they should hide the truth, but I dunno...it was a somber tone-setting if you ask me.
.
So on to the actual film. Monica and David are adorable and incredibly intelligent. Their love is undeniable although at times I felt like Monica was a little irritated with her Hubs (but who doesn't get irritated with their hubs from time to time, right?) They desperately longed for an independent life together but were sheltered by the mama's bears which I totally get 100%. And while I totally "get it" I also recognize that I cannot be like that with Gabby. We have to let go and let our kids out in the world. Nothing will ever change if we're not willing to be vulnerable at times, however hard that may be.
.
There was a clip of Monica's mom (behind closed doors) expressing her dismay at how Monica and David were not keeping up with cleaning their bathroom (which honestly, I'm still baffled at considering Monica's OCD tendencies) and Monica stood outside of the door just listening to her mom. This was probably something that most people wouldn't have batted an eye at but for whatever reason, it made me sad to sit there and watch her listen to her mom be so irritated with her. It's something that any parent goes through, but I have seen it in abundance when I watch these documentaries about people with intellectual disabilities and it scares me. I don't ever want to come across that I am being put out by caring for my child. Monica felt her mother's irritation- you could see it in her eyes. And it hurt her. I know it's bound to happen...Heck, it happens NOW but for Gabby to see it...to hear it...to feel it? Ugh. I hate that. I doubt that paragraph made much sense but oh well.
.
I really don't have a whole lot to say about the film. It makes me scared but it makes me hopeful as well. Monica is 35 years old so it's easy to say that things will be different when Gabby is 35 because THEY WILL. I think Monica and David's parents have done a fabulous job and they have most certainly allowed for incredible opportunities for their children. I mean, can you imagine the thoughts that were going through their heads when their babies were born 35 years ago? We are lucky and things are only going to get better, I know it.
.
If you have HBO, be sure to set your DVR's for this Sunday at 12:45pm PT on HBO East.
.
So I sat down tonight with my Littles' in my arms and we watched...
.
Within the first thirty seconds I was feeling sad. You know how documentaries start of with the black screen with white words talking about "Down syndrome affects 1 in 800, blah blah blah." Well then it goes on to say "The average life expectancy of a person with Down syndrome is 50 years." Ouch. It stung...BAD. And to think- this is SO MUCH BETTER than what it used to be- a mere 35 years. So yeah, I guess I should be grateful but that right there set me off on the wrong foot. I don't know what I expected really. It's not like they were lying or that they should hide the truth, but I dunno...it was a somber tone-setting if you ask me.
.
So on to the actual film. Monica and David are adorable and incredibly intelligent. Their love is undeniable although at times I felt like Monica was a little irritated with her Hubs (but who doesn't get irritated with their hubs from time to time, right?) They desperately longed for an independent life together but were sheltered by the mama's bears which I totally get 100%. And while I totally "get it" I also recognize that I cannot be like that with Gabby. We have to let go and let our kids out in the world. Nothing will ever change if we're not willing to be vulnerable at times, however hard that may be.
.
There was a clip of Monica's mom (behind closed doors) expressing her dismay at how Monica and David were not keeping up with cleaning their bathroom (which honestly, I'm still baffled at considering Monica's OCD tendencies) and Monica stood outside of the door just listening to her mom. This was probably something that most people wouldn't have batted an eye at but for whatever reason, it made me sad to sit there and watch her listen to her mom be so irritated with her. It's something that any parent goes through, but I have seen it in abundance when I watch these documentaries about people with intellectual disabilities and it scares me. I don't ever want to come across that I am being put out by caring for my child. Monica felt her mother's irritation- you could see it in her eyes. And it hurt her. I know it's bound to happen...Heck, it happens NOW but for Gabby to see it...to hear it...to feel it? Ugh. I hate that. I doubt that paragraph made much sense but oh well.
.
I really don't have a whole lot to say about the film. It makes me scared but it makes me hopeful as well. Monica is 35 years old so it's easy to say that things will be different when Gabby is 35 because THEY WILL. I think Monica and David's parents have done a fabulous job and they have most certainly allowed for incredible opportunities for their children. I mean, can you imagine the thoughts that were going through their heads when their babies were born 35 years ago? We are lucky and things are only going to get better, I know it.
.
If you have HBO, be sure to set your DVR's for this Sunday at 12:45pm PT on HBO East.
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3 comments:
I appreciate your thoughts...I felt much the same way about it all. Looking forward to our futures :)
I really want to see it. The girls have seen the previews and always talk about who *they* are going to marry when they see the clips. I'm setting my DVR right now!
Thanks for your review of the film. I still want to see it even if I have a feeling I already *know* how I'll feel about it...
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